Learning to love well

“You are such a good person.” “That must be such a hard job.” “Wow, good for you.” 

Those are just a few of the responses that I get when I tell people what I do for work. I work at Indwell. “Indwell is a Christian charity that creates affordable housing communities that support people seeking health, wellness and belonging.” We often serve people who are living with mental illness, disabilities, and/or homelessness. I specifically work in a group home that offers higher support. I love my job. I love the people whom I serve. But I am not a hero. I am not anything special because this is how I spend my working hours. 

I started working at Indwell in May. Something I didn’t anticipate was the comments I would get. I would tell people where I worked and I would watch their entire perspective on who I was shift. You would think it would be something that felt positive. But instead it made me uncomfortable. It made me feel gross. I was getting all of this praise but it didn’t feel like it would match up with what my job actually looked like. 

My job looks like living life with people. It looks like building relationships that are meaningful. It looks like sitting with people on their bad days. It looks like giving medications at certain times and making meals for certain times. It looks like dealing with a crisis and standing alongside people in their crisis. It looks like seeing people for their potential and believing in that potential. 

My job is not a crazy thing. My job is to love people well and roll with the punches. I don’t deserve praise for that because it is what we should all be doing already in our everyday lives. I just happen to get paid for it. 

Don’t get me wrong; the job can be difficult and chaotic. But so are people. To live in a community is to watch people try and fail and support them anyways. 

I will admit, when I started, I had no clue about anything related to housing or mental illness. Luckily, I have learned a lot. Now when people make comments that could boost my ego, I use it as a space to challenge them in the way they see the world. I get to challenge people to realize that just because they are able to fit into societal standards, does not make them better or above anyone. It means that their life is easier because society values who they are. I also get to challenge people in how they view people who are different. 

My job is to love people well. I mean that sincerely. Loving people well is to love them where they are at. In their brokenness (because we are all broken), in their failures (because we all fail), and in their shortcomings (because we all have them). And isn’t loving people well what Jesus calls us to anyway? 

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another.” 

Romans 12: 9-16

What if we took these words, the words from the heart of God, and took them literally. If we chose to come alongside people in every way (not just with people who feel comfortable and easy to be around)? Jesus didn’t choose the ones who were “easy” to love. He chose the people who were marginalized in society and reminded them of their inherent value as His. There are so many groups of people who have been shoved to the edges of society as being less worthy. Jesus went to them and showed them where their value came from. He didn’t see them as charity. He saw them as individuals in need of unconditional love. He sees us all as that. 

Working at Indwell has not made me feel like a hero or someone who is doing something “good”. Working at Indwell has made me see how much we all are in need of the same things: love, support, and value. Working at Indwell has opened my eyes to see how we need to do better.